I have a friend who was working for an abusive boss and thus started sending out resumes. Over 500 resumes and five months later, she found a new job. Turned out, her new boss was also abusive. Now, when I say abusive, I mean, she publicly belittled her staff, said cruel and unnecessary smack-downs, used unprofessional language, and demeaned their personal character. Needless to say, it has been a tough time for this friend. This past week, my friend received a mid-week text message at 8:30pm from her abusive boss, letting her go from her job.
At first, my friend took this all personally; willing to even question what she had done to provoke such despise from this Cruella Deville boss. She had gone beyond the insightful reflection of looking for lessons, into despair as to why this had happened twice in a row, blaming herself.
I began looking over my daytime life– pretty much all smiles most of the time. Yes, dogs can do gross things, they can be unruly and pull, there are a lot of pedestrians who complicate things with their lack of dog understanding… but all-in-all, it’s a great gig. Dog walks and coaching calls throughout the morning and afternoon, healthy lunches at home, witnessing new flowers, enjoying the weather, holding in-depth conversations with beautiful souls seeking to align to their desires – and it made me really feel for my friend. She had no idea that this kind of daytime joy was even possible. So, we talked, and I witnessed her strong spirit regain the belief that happiness was possible for her. Circumstances began to unravel in front of her, with several separate employers all eager to know more about her and her skill set. Within three days, without hundreds of resumes sent, but rather a simple shift in her mindset and energy, she was offered a promising job.
I’m guessing you’re wondering how she had this mindset switch-a-roo so quickly. She simply tapped into who she is, and what she deserves and desires. Once we hold a stronger belief in ourselves, we are able to access our desires, and thus call upon our learned skills and the confidence that lies within them. While my friend is incredibly talented, she’s spent this past year remaking other areas of her life to awaken new possibilities that insisted she question some old, habitual beliefs. And, the more she was willing to question these un-serving beliefs, the more her soul was awakened to the potential for a new lifestyle. It’s been a privilege to witness her shift towards the life of her dreams. At some point it was obvious, that she would need to tackle her career in this mix, as her previous jobs were merely a reflection of her past beliefs, and no longer stood with any sincere rooting in this newly constructed life plan.
So, what about you? Any areas of your life where you might consider expecting more? Are you able to take a breath and drop into that part of your life that needs revision; feeling the energy of it in your body? Likely it creates a dissonance, or sense of frenzy, within you as it mixes into your calmed mind in a grounded state. Ask yourself – What part of this is no longer tolerable? Be specific. It’s not just your boss, but rather the language that she uses, or the workload expectations she has, or the commute, or the particular ink pens you are required to use. In all seriousness, what is it that, when you focus in on it, elevates the feeling of dissonance within you? Get a clear understanding, as it may be more than one part of your current job that has you feeling this way. Now, I want you to ask yourself – What if I insisted on more from my life? What would that mean? Likely, this will also be followed by some uncomfortable energy, as it is foreign to your body to welcome in these types of thoughts. Ask – What would I have to let go of to be able to allow myself to take a leap of faith?
You see, it’s not our boss, or anyone else, we want to expect more from; it’s ourselves. There is a belief within us that tells us we must accept or tolerate the situations we currently find ourselves in, otherwise we would devise an exit strategy and move forward, like my friend courageously did by taking a rotten situation and recognizing it wasn’t hers to digest. Her ability to let go allowed her to not be painted with anger and doubt, but rather embrace the blank canvas her new situation had created FOR her. Life intervened to offer her the opportunity to embrace her value and expect more.