Perhaps you’ve seen those incredible rock formations that seem unbelievably balanced in the most peculiar and beautiful stacks and shapes? As you stare upon them it seems a gentle wind could topple them, but yet they remain. I began to wonder how many people feel their life’s balance is as precarious as those stacked rocks. Their life is working but it certainly feels unstable, almost fragile, as we add in rock after rock of obligations. Perhaps you have rocks in your life that feel like monstrous boulders that, with any momentum, could be proven destructive? Perhaps your rocks are stacked, but the art of you is certainly not reflected in the haphazard design?
So, how do we choose our rocks, or obligations, that lead to a balanced presence; reflecting the beauty that lies within? First, we have to ask ourselves why we agreed to so many rocks? Was it to prove something? Was it simply a reflection of the pressures we once could manage? Is it financial, so we can maintain all our material needs? Is it social, to uphold our place, or our families standing? Is this about our drive or our passion that pushes us to extend ourselves. So, what draws you to the life rocks you are currently attempting to balance?
First things first- are there any little rocks, wedged in, that seem necessary but that are perhaps filling a gap? An area within that feels tender or fragile, that by taking on an obligation we are able to conveniently push to a back burner? So often it’s not the big boulders of our life that overwhelm us, but rather the smaller “filler” rocks that clutter our simplicity and felt purpose. It can be intense to begin to investigate our intentions behind those seemingly small rocks. However, as we do, we heal those avoided challenges in our life, freeing ourselves to look on life with a greater sense of truth and presence. These smaller rocks likely look like daily or weekly obligations that we’ve put on ourselves, or that turn us 180 degrees as we’re about to tackle a project we’d prefer to avoid. It’s when we begin re-negotiating when we’ll start, or when we’ll get moving, or how we can put it off… those little pebbles are covering something much larger that yearns for our attention and healing.
Let us not forget those mid-sized stones; they are likely holding a facet of our passions. Stones we would like to be the boulders of our life but yet our necessary obligations feel omnipresent and unchangeable. I would ask you to consider a time in your life when those boulders didn’t exist… so it would seem then that they are not permanent. They may have just been in your life so long that they feel permanent. While I’m not one to say- walk away from all of your obligations that don’t fully resonate with you, because, if we’re being honest, that’s not always realistic. What I will say is, if you’re unhappy- make a change. That change may be a physical change, such as applying for a new job, or spending less time with friends that don’t fulfill you. Or, it may be a mindset change; how we view those obligations so we can look on them with peace rather than drudgery.
Typically those heavy boulders are filled with expectations. And, when our expectations are not met, we begin to resent and despise those boulders. When we feel that what we desire is not possible, we begin to lose hope. Let me ask you this- if that boulder were to explode tomorrow, what would you do? What if you did that now? And, if that boulder were never to move, how could you chisel it to see its beauty? How would you need to look upon it to see what’s possible?
Where in your life do you feel that harmonious balance? What makes it feel that way? What are those obligations feeding in you? Recognizing where that balance exists gives us the ability to look on the smaller rocks and boulders with a greater sense of truth. There may be days where our rock formation feels unstable, but yet, here you are… still standing.